I guess

A person can only do as much as they can do.. and I know when a person has done as much as they can do then they can do nothing more. Sometimes an end comes.. Sometimes even as much as a person hates it, they reach their limits and they know it. Even if you love someone with all your heart you sometimes have to quit. You just do. Even if you try, you know when you are done. You know at this point it's a matter of survival. Can't be done. Not working and energy is being expended for nothing. Why nothing? Because it's not working. So very sad. J

Who am I?

Am I not who I thought I've always been? Who am I anyway? All my life I've prided myself on being a thoughtful, caring person who fights for most causes,, especially if it includes poverty stricken, children, hungry or homeless people. I especially HATE to see people make fun of those who are different... gays, fat people or those with mental illnesses. Has all my life been a lie? Who am I? Who the hell am I anyway? I don't think I can do this. Everyone tells me this is the best thing to do.... that I must do it for my own sanity. I know that's true but it's not me. Not not not not me. I don't think I can do this and yet I can't not do this. I hate this. It's not me. It's not who I am, is it? I would hate to think this is what I've become, cold, heartless and uncaring.

Ok I did start

printing the pictures... first I had to finish cropping and lightening some of them.. I got about 36 or so printed, not even close to half of what I want to do. I'm putting four on a page. But as expected I ran out of ink,, so hopefully tomorrow I can get a cartridge.

What else did I do today??? Hmmm can't think. Maybe I did nothing else. Oh yes I did something. I cleaned out my computer, cleaned out all the old mail both recieved and sent. Cleaned out my favorite places and ran a scan disk and defragmented. Then I emptied my temp. internet files and tossed all the cookies. I even emptied the trash bin.. computer ran much better too. They get bogged down. After I get the pics printed that I want I will delete some of them from the computer too. I have already put them all on the external hard drive.

That's it. J

I must confess

I did not print any pictures as promised and planned. But I did work on some pictures. I've chosen all the ones I want to print and today I was checking each one to see if it needed cropping or lightening etc. Didn't finish getting them ready.

But I made to pans of oopsie rolls and one pan of cheese biscuits. It's something.

Very tired. Going to bed now. J

OK that's it....

No more loafing days.. tomorrow I start printing the 2009 pics that need to be put in albums.. Don't know what I'm waiting for. I got up really early this morning and didn't sleep worth a darn last night.. the wind was howling and the windows were rattling... and the dog was restless and I had coffee too late which kept me awake and I drank too much of it which gave me irregular heart beats.

That's today in a teeensy nut shell. J

Rain?

YES WE'VE HAD RAIN.... and it's beeen so windy. I haven't been out of the house in days.. Maybe tomorrow it will be better.

I still haven't started a craft... but I've thought about it.. does that count? I think I'm going to rig up something to set on my night stand so I can put my lamp on it and that way maybe I can read in bed sometimes. I used to love to read in bed. I'm going to ask santa for a kindle.. but until then I do have several new books.

Also want a three wheel bike and don't want to wait for Christmas to get that. I was saving my cents but used it for Christmas stuff and then the money I got for Christmas I used for flowers and craft stuff.. now I'm broke and must start again..

J

Not writing daily anymore...

Guess it's because I don't do things daily that are worth writing about ... today I did get my closet cleaned. Concentrated on the craft side. Lots of stuff in there and now I know where it's all at in case I need it. I want to start doing some type of craft before this month is over. I made a resolution, to myself... to make at least one Christmas ornament per month for the whole year. I also have that table scarf I started way long ago.. hard to sit and do it when the tip of my spine is so so swollen and sore.

need toast.
nite
J

I'll finish at some point..

Ironed one more pair of drapes , put the pins in and got it hung. Now we're at a standstill till the other smaller pair comes.. then the hard work begins. I will have to put three panels together for each side of the front windows and then iron the whole thing. I think we'll iron them on the table. I''ll put a blanket or something over the table. I'll be so glad when this job is finished. It's proven to be a lot of work. Don't want to work.

Went and had one lump removed from my arm. Hurts a little tonight but not too bad. No arthritis meds for 2 more days the dr. says. Will go back in February to remove the one from my face.

Other than those two things and cooking dinner, I've done nothing today.. need to get working on the 2009 photos. Can't believe I haven't printed one single picture or updated one single album...

I'm tired tonight.. J

Boy it takes a long time

to do just a little bit ... that's when you can tell you are getting old. I worked all day just getting tiebacks cut and put on the sheers.. and I ironed one curtain. Wore me out. geesh.

J